Sleaze-y, Twee-zy, Beautiful Tumblr Girls: Are these cursed fashion trends really coming back?

Trigger Warning: this blog might be upsetting to you if you were a victim of fashion crimes, don’t want to acknowledge the fact that you’re getting old, or easily suffer from second-hand embarrassment.  But first, let’s set the scene: 

It’s three weeks into the new year, meaning our champagne hangovers have finally gone flat, our well-intentioned resolutions are starting to lose steam, and the snow is melting enough to tease us into trying to show leg on 10-degree nights out.  January 2022 is upon us with clouds of gray skies and yet another Covid variant fogging up the horizon for the foreseeable future.  The Kardashians allegedly took out their BBLs, Megan Fox and Britney Spears are regular tabloid targets again, and Geriatric Millennials are still sharing corny Facebook statuses about the insurrection. Have déjà vu yet?

Regardless of your worldview or spiritual alignments, it’s hard to deny we live in a cyclical world.  Whether it’s the changing seasons or a Samantha Jones-less Sex and the City reboot that no one wanted, an earthly existence is one destined to repeat itself.  There’s birth, there’s life, there’s death, and there’s birth again.  Unfortunately for me, the circle of life doesn’t exclude shitty fashion trends from my teenage years.

Although the exact timespan varies, it’s been pretty universally-accepted in the fashion community that trend cycles repeat themselves every 20 years (a prime example is co-ord mini skirts and cardigans popular in the 1960s, 1990s, and late 2010s).  In many instances, this is a good thing!  The Y2K and McBling aesthetic resurgences have provided these pandemic years with a shot of much-needed rhinestone fun, and I don’t think very many women have complained since high-rise jeans became acceptable again.  

However, for reasons such as the rise in online shopping, fast fashion, influencer culture, faux nostalgia, boredom, etc., Gen Z is ramping up the 20-year trend cycle by basically slashing it in half.  This is bad news for the environment, but more importantly, it’s terrible news for me.  Why?  For God knows what reason, Tik Tok teens are starting to romanticize the horrendous fashion eras that plagued my middle and high school years, and keep me up at night to this day (I basically have to count Peter Do ensembles to fall asleep).

According to 19-year-old FIT students online (I turn to them for everything nowadays), the following cursed trends from the late 2000s – early 2010s are predicted to make a comeback in a big way.  I’m going to list them from least-troublesome to full on nightmare-inducing, because: 1. I’m sadistic, and 2. the longer I can put off thinking about Tw-…Twe…*gags* Twee (shudders), the better.

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The Tumblr Girl

Defining Characteristics: skater skirts, chokers, babydoll dresses, Dr. Martens, fishnet stockings, band t-shirts, Mary Jane shoes, ripped skinny jeans, smudged eyeliner, messy hair, lots of black

Reminds Me Of: American Apparel, soft-core porn gifs, Sky Ferreira, poems written on cigarettes, overblown depression, Brandy Melville, wilted roses, graffiti, the Arctic Monkeys, the Virgin Suicides, “waif” culture (eating disorder culture was/is big on tumblr.com).

My Take: I’m listing this era first because it’s by far the least-heinous to me, and as a Lana del Rey fan since Born to Die was the free song of the week on iTunes, it’s the closest to my heart.  It’s dark, self-objectifying, and a little pick-me, just like yours truly! 

I also see this 2014 trend resurgence transitioning the most smoothly into popularity, as the style staples are pretty minimalist and ubiquitous in Gen Z/Millennial closets already… Dr. Martens and band tees are pretty standard issue in the average 20-something’s wardrobe, even if they’re Def Leppard shirts from Urban Outfitters instead of the 1975 (also from Urban Outfitters).

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Where It’s Going: The popularity of Tumblr has dipped dramatically (let’s be honest, since they took out the porn), but adopting and projecting aesthetics on social media is more of a lifestyle than ever.  Luckily, in many ways, increased internet access has made the younger generation more fashion-savvy and somewhat less cliche.  American Apparel is still recovering from their 2015 bankruptcy, but I predict online retailers like Los Angeles Apparel and Depop will seamlessly transition this somewhat-gatekept, but sartorially effortless trend cycle back into our closets. 

I’m predicting less “emo grunge” this time around and more tennis skirts, gold jewelry, “trad” or Catholic influence, and nods to girly high-fashion brands like Simone Rocha.  I anticipate its newfound-adopters to carry copies of My Year of Rest and Relaxation as accessories and to have post-left ideologies and the word “cheugy” ready to fly off their tongues at any moment.  

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Indie Sleaze

Defining Characteristics: neon, graphic tees, layered necklaces, zip-up hoodies, skinny jeans, flannels, pleather jackets, glitter, cheap sunglasses, flatbill hats, ripped tights, deep side parts, metallics

Reminds Me Of: Jersey Shore, digital cameras, “I <3 Boobies” bracelets, feathers, lots of foundation, David Guetta, hangovers, the Yeah Yeah Yeahs, American Apparel (again), XX Pro and Valencia, Rue 21, the music video for “Habits” by Tove Lo

My Take:  This high-clash, low-class trend first hinted at a resurgence when TikTok videos went viral highlighting the legacy of The Cobra Snake, a photographer notorious for photographing sweaty, wasted, largely poorly-dressed celebrities in the nightclub scene. Indie Sleaze is actually a stellar example of the twenty-year trend cycle, because it’s basically a straight riff off 80s neon electro-rock style, peppered with some 60s hippie elements… and literal trash!

For me, this aesthetic is like if early Ke$ha was an outfit.  I love early Ke$ha; I don’t love original Indie Sleaze.  However, I’m ranking this era whose styles will inevitably return to Forever 21 sweatshops soon as a lesser fashion evil, because at least it’s really fun. 

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Where It’s Going: I predict that some elements of Indie Sleaze will re-emerge into our collective party-clothes consciousness, but like I said before with Tumblr Girls, we’re smarter now (at least with how we dress).  Conversely, I think you can argue that our youngest consumers are more apathetic than their Gen-X and Millennial counterparts were a decade ago.  From what I can tell, “professional” social media accounts are disappearing faster than our faith in the two-party system. Why would we dress to impress a country that’s always leaving us on read?

I see certain elements like colorful accessories, skater influence, and glitter (cough cough, Euphoria) coming back in full force.  Otherwise, I see Instagram inspiring more cohesive, stylishly sleazy outfits; aka I think we’re going to go more naughty and less filthy-looking.  Think pentagrams and irony on our crop tops instead of sweat stains and neon paint splatter (rising star designer Ashley Williams or limited-drop e-retailer Praying could be good benchmarks of what’s to come).  At the end of the day, I don’t really want this busy, tacky trend to come back in full force, but hey, the world’s on fire.  You might as well dress like a hot mess.

And last, but most certainly least, I burden you with…

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Twee

Defining Characteristics: Mary Jane shoes, a-line skirts and dresses, peter pan collars, heavy bangs, wayfarer glasses, matte red lipstick, whimsical patterns, cardigans, tights and bobby socks, pea-coats, headbands, silly accessories

Reminds me of: horse girls, ModCloth, Zooey Deschanel, being “adorkable”, ethical veganism, Portlandia, Matt and Kim, coffee shop culture, the Royal Family, cross-country running, elementary school teachers, Wes Anderson, stomach ulcers, and its equally-vile male counterpart: The Hipster.

My Take: I know that I don’t post articles often (I’m playing hard to get), but if you’re at all familiar with commeunesoleil.com or have any conception of who I am as a person, it shouldn’t come to a shock to you that I hate twee. Why? To be honest, I’m judgmental. I’m a little pretentious. I’m easily-annoyed AND I’m a Scorpio Moon. I was strapping Lego bat wings to my Bratz dolls before I could read a Harry Potter book (another trait of Twee culture: fuckin Potterheads).

Twee is not at all aligned with my personal style, but unfortunately, it is rooted in good fashion. The ensembles are generally a bit adventurous, and it’s common to mix textures via layering. Highly reminiscent of the 1940s – 1960s, this punchy style calls back to a shinier, Mad Men era where women didn’t have to work! 😀 Also, one of my favorite movies, Amelie, is dripping with twee (and tears from my eyes when I watch it).

Maybe I’m jaded or was just annoyed by my female classmates in Honors English, but I view your average Twee fan to be lacking in the impish romanticism of Amelie and completely devoid of the feminine magnetism Christina Hendricks brings into the break room (and, technically, when she walks out of it). To me, Twee is overrated, obnoxious, and sexless, but maybe I’m projecting. Lol. As if.

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Where It’s Going: Another thing I find dreadful about a twee comeback is how long it was around the first time! I love Portlandia, but it was on eight seasons! And I can’t even watch more than a couple episodes without taking a break to take two advil.

As with our other re-emerging cursed trends, I predict a wiser take on twee from our trusty Gen-Z nostalgia-appropriators. I can see twee naturally evolving in one of two ways: 1. loaded up on like-colored, but differently-patterned, layers, in a cute Anna Sui way; 2. heavily queer-ified, with bright colors and bold, deconstructed knits (think Ella Emhoff, whom I also dislike). Either of these options would be better than OG Twee, and I will accept either of them with open arms if it means I never have to be exposed to “Who’s that girrrrl? It’s Jess!” culture again. Although I do sense a New Girl reboot on the horizon.

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In conclusion, we’re living in a cyclical world and a government-perpetuated pandemic, and the teens are bored and looking for identity so they’re looking to borrow one from the Macklemore era. It’s pretty tragic, but Gen-Z haven’t completely let us down as of late. They will without a doubt make any revamped early 2010s trends more size, race, and gender-inclusive (you may have noticed all the skinny white bitches in this article… I tried to find people of color in Twee in my “2014 tumblr girl” search and my computer caught fire).

I believe the youth will carry us through this cringe trend-recycling as gracefully as they did with my Y2K fashion (<3), and hopefully, it will be over before it really begins. But in the meantime, you better get your knee-high socks, a-line skirts, and MAC Ruby Woo ready. I’ll see you in hell, Zooey Deschanel. X